Who’s Been Married The Longest?
There’s this thing a DJ will sometimes do a wedding where they have a little contest and they say, “Raise your hands if you been married for more than five years,” and a bunch of hands will go up. Then he’ll say ,”Keep your hands up if you been married for more than 10 years,” and some of the hands will come down. He’ll keep going until they get down to the last couple. If Steve and Mary happened to be there, they were always the last couple standing. The DJ would ask Steve, “What is the secret to a long and happy marriage?” Steve would answer with two words… Dolgozz Keményen which is Hungarian for “hard work.”
Words That Define
My client, McLane, commissioned me to hand-lettered those two words in memory of Steve, her late grandfather, and she plans to frame them with a picture of him riding his tractor. McLane says that those two words, Dolgozz Keményen, really mean a lot to her and in many ways come to define who she is. I was just so in love with this sweet simple story that I was really excited to be a part of the project and and see this piece come to life.
Didn’t Use the Word “Love”
It’s funny to me that McLane’s grandfather didn’t use the word “love” to answer the question of what makes for a long and happy marriage. The way to McLean talks about her grandparents–the common heritage they shared, how her grandmother claims to have ensnared her grandfather with lemon pie and cabbage rolls, and seeing pictures of the two of them together–it’s very clear that they were in love.
We can be moved by the feeling of love, but it’s the commitment, the sacrifice, the showing up, and the hard work that keep us in motion
Love In Action
When I think about the things for which we use the word “love”–for our spouse, our children, our creative work–it’s not that fleeting feeling of love that keeps us bound to those things, but it’s something deeper. Certainly we can be moved by the feeling of love but it’s the commitment, the sacrifice, the showing up, and the hard work that keep us in motion. There are so many moments when doing the things that we love and being with the people we love feels like hard work, and it should. In a way, these two words can be used as the verb form of love. It is love in action. “Dolgozz Keményen” your family. “Dolgozz Keményen” your work. If more people meant that when they said the word “love” the world would be a better place.
When you say you love something, show it. Be committed. Make sacrifices. Show up every day. Work hard.
Process Shots:
