Our family just took a weekend away in the country and I wanted to change things up a little bit and share a brief story about our time there and the impact it had on my mindset in the midst of some challenging circumstances.
Small Town Fever
My wife, Rachel, and I have similar backgrounds. We both grew up either in the country or living in a small town. I remember my friends all talking about how eager they were to graduate and get away from small town life. I don’t actually remember sharing their sentiments, but today I do find myself a little tied down to city life. I feel comfortable in my suburban neighborhood, not too close to the busyness of downtown, but still close enough to get there when I want to. All of the things I want or need are just a 5-10 minute drive away. The elementary school where our boys attend is within walking distance. When I imagine living out in the country or moving to a small town, I start to feel a little anxious about not being able to get to a store within 5 minutes or having to send my boys to school on a bus. Still, there are some things that I would love about it. Maybe one day I’ll let myself experience small town or country living again first hand.
Frito Pie
My wife’s hometown baptist church was celebrating 75 years since its founding, and we were all invited to come to their morning service and catered lunch this past Sunday to enjoy the celebration. We could have just come up for the day, but something in me said that we needed to spend more time there if we could. My in-laws are really cool, and they were thrilled to have us come up on Friday evening with their grand-babies to spend the weekend. We arrived to their little home out in the country on Friday night just as the sun was setting, and my mother-in-law walked out to greet us and let us know that they had prepared some chili and cornbread for Frito-pie. I love Frito-pie.
The rest of the weekend was so relaxing. We woke up early the next morning and took the boys into town to enjoy a parade, complete with marching bands from the competing schools in the area, local businesses, kung-fu demonstrations, old fashioned cars, and beauty queens. We also happened to be sitting right next to the tent where Nonny and Poppy (the boys’ grandparents) were helping run a bake sale. In that sitting we filled our treat quota for the whole month. Later that afternoon, the boys and I just played out in a field for a few hours, then that evening the in-laws watched the boys for us while we drove the 40 minutes into a slightly bigger town for dinner and a movie.
The 75 year celebration the following morning was both inspiring and fun. It was refreshing to look around the room and see people with so much joy and contentment on their faces, to hear them talk and laugh, to hear kids running around and playing together. It was refreshing to experience that feeling of not being in a hurry. After the lunch we said our goodbyes, packed everyone up in the minivan, and made the 3 hour drive back to San Antonio.
Distance From Our Daily Experience
The week prior to this trip had been a particularly challenging one. There were things that didn’t go through that we were counting on for business, news about changes with Rachel’s employment and some difficult decisions about what we were going to do next to navigate these challenges. I realized as soon as we arrived at my in-laws house that Friday evening why we needed so badly to go and spend a couple of days there. At home, in San Antonio, were the reminders of all of the obstacles and challenges, problems for which we had no solutions, anxieties and fears. Sometimes these things cloud up our minds so much that it’s difficult to look objectively at our circumstances in a way that allows us to see what real options exist. The change in scenery did wonders for me. I needed a new context, and to get some distance from my every day experience in order to have the clarity of mind necessary to accurately assess my circumstances and my options.
We returned home yesterday evening right around dinner time. The house was messy, our refrigerator was nearly empty, the boys were still wound up on their “vacation high” and our twins (the youngest boys) apparently picked up some kind of stomach virus during the trip which is currently making things… interesting. We are basically hitting the ground running, but I brought something back with me from this weekend away that I couldn’t have found had we stayed here. It’s a mix of clarity, courage, rejuvenation, inspiration… maybe to sum it up in a word, hope. Hope is a surprising, yet welcomed guest in the middle of our current struggles. It’s driving my work, and showing me possibilities I might not have otherwise considered.
Hope
Hopefully you’re not having a similar experience right now. I hope you’re reading this and saying, ‘I can’t relate, everything is good right now.’ But if you can relate, I encourage you to get away from the familiar. Put some distance between yourself and your struggles. Get around some people who know who you are and care about you. Maybe this is something you could make a regular practice of doing, whether its going for a walk in the park, getting out to a national forest, driving to the country, or maybe even a trip to the city is just the change in scenery you need. Take the trip. Get away. Even if it’s just for a few hours. Your work and all of your struggles will still be waiting for you when you get back. They’re not going anywhere. It’s worth it to get away if it helps to lead you to a better, healthier mindset, and reminds you that you do have choices, that these circumstances aren’t forever, and that you are capable of facing these challenges.
Peace,
Ben